By guest blogger – Phyllis Lanich
We humans, as a whole, are social. We all want to join in and be accepted. None of us want to be left behind and be alone. If we do, then people will then think there is something wrong with us. We all want a friend to exchange ideas with or share interests.
For example, take a look on Facebook or a community board (at your local library.) Notice there is many, many clubs that you can join for any interest you can name.
While in school, loneliness did not seem to be a problem and we wanted be a member of the “most popular club in school” or there were other clubs we could be involved in. But as we grow older, the fewer friends we have.
Society and Hollywood tells us that we should be well endowed with friends. But the problem is that after graduation, many friends separate never to be heard from again except at reunions.
Many songs even address this topic “You’ve Got A Friend” by Carole King or “You’ve Got A Friend In Me” by Randy Newman, come to mind.
There is one thing for sure: We must pick our friends wisely or they can put us in trouble. Some friends make, or try to make, us do things that they would not do themselves like stealing or playing a trick on a teacher or school mate. Then the other persons involved now know they had someone to pick on!!! – ME!!!!
I then became a People Pleaser doing whatever I was told to do good or bad. I can remember as a middle schooler, I wanted to sit with the party crowd at lunch. I was abruptly told “No, you don’t smoke pot.” Even thought I was hurt, I took my lunch tray and moved to another table. With that, I felt a sense of pride and realized I did need them as friends after all.